Thursday, April 05, 2007

Beyond the usual

I have been seriously contemplating about deleting the blog for a very long time now. There are a multitude of reasons for the same. But, the basic and most honest one is that I dont have anything new to write anymore these days. So, instead of typing a nonsensical mix of thoughts and words, it is better to graze the platform only to ground.

However, at the risk of a lot of criticism, I contradict my own statement, at least for today. As much as I complain about shortage of time, something compels me to write this today. It may not make a lot of sense, it may not even follow a meticulous chain of thought. But it is what is running helter-skelter in my mind right now.

Since a kid, colours and patterns have not only fascinated me, but at times drawn me towards them. I have a weird habit of drawing leaves and eyes whenever I have a pen in my hand, however that is not really the point here. So, I always wanted to pursue fashion designing, till the time in my XIth standard I realised, that the world of adults is really about Engineers and Doctors (though personally I can refute that any day). However, there was a gentleman whose style I always admired. Because he was elegant himself, spoke less and concentrated in his work.

Recently, I came across this anniversary issue of the magazine Verve, and it somehow manages to catch up with Shahab Durazi. An excerpt from the article reads '....Welcome to Duraziland. Images whisper. Fantasy and finery go hand in hand in a well stitched glove...... Durazi's clothes make you a confident insider. Now and zen...'. The article goes on to state how Durazi, a self acclaimed recluse, prefers to be seduced by the fabrics that he holds, instead of the cash that he can earn.

While reading the article, my initial liking for him transformed into awe and respect, and I felt a sudden kinship. Kinship? Yes. Durazi talks about questions he raises, the societal customs of politeness and air kissing that he dislikes. In short, I realised that my breed is yet not extinct. There are more who like to question.

A friend's friend told me today that I have a difefrent way of looking at things, a fresher perspective. I think I refuse to believe existing statements. Many (including those close to me), see me as a rebel. Many think that I complicate things too much for myself, by thinking too much. And many just feel, that it is the vagary of my age. I think, it is my fundamental right.

Now, I like to think. And analyse too. And then, I like to question what is that I dont understand. Now, whats wrong in that? Nothing much. Except the fact, that people senior (in age and rank), think quite negatively about me.
When I was young, I thought I will change the world. The world tried to change me, all through the years. We are still fighting, but victory sure seems near.

7 comments:

Gyaan Guru said...

Exactly!!! Even i wanted to change the world, (still do) and the world tried to change me too. Today reading your blog was like reading my thoughts except for the drawing leaves and eyes though i have a Habit of writing my name or drawing an elephant. Anyways thats crap....at some things we think alike, and i know there is nothing wrong with me, what i dont know is what i want


ps. Dont delete the blog its nice to find someone alike

Sassy Satan said...

Hm..its nice to know Rahul that you find the blog (read me) nice. :-)
You know what I think, most people have the same questions and doubts as you and me. The only unfortunate thing that separates us is the fact that these people choose to maintain a farcical exterior. They question, but within themselves.

But, thanks for such regular meetings. Keep posting. Tadaa!

Abhishek Chatterji said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Abhishek Chatterji said...

wow..nw dat ws smthn..amazin yaar..words fail me here..

every1 at sm point of time wants 2 change the world..u know dat age wen eveything seems within ur reach....but in d end..like u said..it happens in d reverse..pressure from all quarters..dats wt changes people..

all dat remains is smthn vague..a remembrance of wat u had thought abt..n a wish dat u cud have pursued it..all 2 late..

keep it up ..

moonstruck maniac said...

good post sasssy!!!!!
the world is a foolish place that is driven by a lack of self respect. Our intelligence is made to be synonymous with passive reception of societal trends that are a product of us, of the yore. Time is to change, break and refute them. You are one of those who have the spark for the same, so THUMBS UP, taste the thunder, for it will be a great ride. Keep the spirits up. and DONT YOU EVER THINK ABOUT DELETING THE BLOG!!!

Sassy Satan said...

Thanks for the comment!

But I truly believe, that it is in an individual's hands whether he/she wants to be changed. If you are weak, you will surrender to forces. But, am sure that if one is determined and has self-belief, then nothing can change him/her.

And you know having wistful thinking..regrets and unfulfilled desires only hamper one's life. I follow my impulses, get hurt, enjoy them and walk on...

Cheers!

Sassy Satan said...

Well, Moonstruck, what to say. You have been one of those, whose posts are truly brilliant. And looking at those, I get the strength to voice (actually type) my own views.
And I totally agree with you about fake societal trends. With reference to our conversation about Ste'v'ens today, do you realise it is the same thing. You are elitist and happening, if you become an able flagbearer, if you carry on the imperialistic hangover. So, the world is like that.

Sad joke about thumbs up( Though I got a different meaning the first two times that I read it, as in the thunder of change).

Thanks for your interest in the blog. Shall not delete it. However, lovely to see you back at saintinquest.

Desperately awaiting action at brainscram. We want posts. Toodloo! :-)